If only I could see only smiling faces…

I was planning on writing something else, but have found myself drawn back to this topic… 

I know I have talked about how I have trouble with faces before… so perhaps this is just an update… It really has proven to be a constant source of stress that is hard to overcome… 

You see, although I haven’t had one website view in the past 4 or 5 days, in my head, I think billions of people read my posts… including everyone I might come across in a day… 

So, it is frustrating when I see negative faces or people that look mad at me, I take it very personally… I like to look at people’s faces to help gauge the reaction to things I say, especially since people don’t comment on my posts… I desire feedback… 

Which, it is very hard to come to terms with not seeing smiling faces all the time… But I have to accept that I probably won’t ever see 100% smiling faces all the time while I am in this initiation/bet… technically, given the information given to me, no one should really even know who I am, or that they certainly don’t take the time to read my posts… It should be in a way, like nobody knows who I am… 

So, given the parameters of this initiation/bet and what information is given to me… I will always see many neutral faces or people with (resting bitch face)… sometimes people will just look downright upset… It is hard for me… 

It is especially hard because I have a tough time not trying to figure out why people are mad at me… I used to do that all the time, I would replay everything I said in my head to try and see what could have made people mad or why people may have taken something the wrong way… I would then always address all of the possible problems I could find… I even started to feel that they would try to use a specific type of person to look at me a certain way… so if I was seeing a lot of mad old people, I would ask myself, what did I say or do that is making old people so mad?…which then you could take that question and just insert any given type of person… 

It was probably a good thing in some ways, because I was probably addressing real concerns some people had… maybe that is what was really happening for a while as I was trying to win everybody over to my side… gradually winning over all of the different groups and age groups… I was constantly trying to address any concerns people might have… it probably helped me evolve in some ways and really smooth out my message and fine tune it… 

This whole process is even more elevated when you include the news and documentaries and things like that… trying to take on and win over ever group, no matter where their viewpoints were… I might hear some horrible viewpoint and my opinion would be, that viewpoint exists and everything in between, so I would address it… I always addressed the worst-case scenario, even if just in case… I would have rather had some instance of delusion than not address some really negative or evil viewpoint or thought about something… which I am sure that my enemy used my internal process against me, making up very negative viewpoints and opinions by groups that they never actually said… 

But now I have gotten to a point where I tend to believe it is just Good vs. Evil left and not much if anything in between… there are people on the other side of this initiation/bet and then there is everybody on my side of the initiation/bet… I don’t even think proportionally the other side has that many people, it is just that a small proportion can still contain millions of people that could potentially reek a lot of havoc. 

My opinion is that there really isn’t that much more I can do on the grounds of having people switch to my side… I have a feeling we do scrape away at their side little by little… but that responsibility can now be delegated to many of the people on my side… as well as the reasoning with anybody left in the middle… 

I don’t believe basically anything I see or hear in the news anymore except for natural disasters… I think we are experiencing the greatest world peace the world has ever known and that we are all working together more than ever to achieve common goals… 

I don’t believe any of the negative faces anymore either… It is just that old habits die hard and I so desire just to see smiling faces all the time and to just be surrounded by people that are happy with all that I have done…  

The faces just have a special power over me for sure… probably to because I have always valued the opinions of my hometown my entire life, they have always had a special place in my heart… A large driving factor of my life was always trying to make my hometown (The Valley) proud… I always desired to be seen in a positive light by these people… 

I have to learn to let it go though… accept there is no way I am going to see 100% smiling faces while I am in this initiation/bet…  

I have to trust that I have already won in many ways… no more battles left for me to fight… 

I personally feel so good about to the point I have gotten too, that if I went a bit nuts now, it’s not like people would hold it against me, that it isn’t who I am… people have seen and know the true me anymore, anything else would be a sign that I just need some help or something… which is a good feeling, takes a lot of pressure off, don’t have to worry about everything I say and feel like I am walking on egg shells… don’t have to replay everything the way I used to… I feel the unconditional Love now… I might also say that I feel that I earned it…  

If that all makes sense… 

Book Club (Predictably Irrational by Dan Ariely): Chapter 5…

Comments as they appeared in my mind while reading the Chapter… Shorter Chapter this week! 

 

I think my discussion on weddings will be a separate blog post… The wedding dress example very much crosses over into a multitude of regions; weddings, high fashion, labels, status items, materialism, status in general, etc… 

  • Sorry if I seem like I am knocking people, to each their own… In some families the wedding dress run has even become a tradition or rite of passage. 
  • I worry a little bit with what is going on mentally and culturally with the wedding dress run… Not that it is the greatest cause for concern by any means… Sorry, my honest opinion. 
  • To me it almost comes off as a bit dystopian or degrading in some ways… The optics aren’t the greatest… Again, I am sorry… 
  • I think this speaks to something that was drilled into female culture that many people are trying to drive out… (I also don’t like how woman are expected to wear something different every day of the year!) 

Interesting, Fun, and Humorous section on the Sushi. It is funny to think about how often that happens in our own lives… Many, Many, times… 

  • Fun section in general to think about and all of its intricacies when communal and price meet.  
  • For me, in the grocery store, how many are left often lends to how many of a deal I will take. I feel a little less selfish and more economically savvy when there are plenty of a deal left… That could be another interesting study, change how many starbursts are on the table. 
  • They are paying for the sushi, so this does run a little counter to his hypothesis from the candy experiment… that communal and market can overlap… Of course, it probably varies by person as well  

Interesting experiments and eye opening to see the price of zero’s relationship with social norms. 

  • I’m not so sure this would work for something like oil or gasoline though… you know what I mean! 

The effort section left me wanting a lot more research and opinions… I am not sure how much I concur with his final assessment; I find a lot of different variables that could play a role in the experiment. 

  • I think this is more just getting the conversation started rather than concluding it. Interesting stuff though! Very thought provoking! (A common term I use to describe this Author and his Book)  

Interesting thoughts at the end… The real change in my opinion could come on the consumer end. Social norms are much more being applied to an informed consumer. Which the consumer tends to hold the most power in a market driven society. A power not fully understood and harnessed yet. 

  • You know me, I like the idea of a consumer union that looks out for consumers and helps shape the world in a positive way. 
  • A power not to be used lightly though, it can be a delicate balance between consumer and producer. Best to apply reasoning and civility! 

 

A little shorter chapter this week… interesting stuff though. Thought provoking as usual! 

Some thoughts on the Grand Illusion (?) of Time…

I tend to believe that we are still in the base state of existence or that we are subject to it. The base state of existence, is a state of existence that must exist in order for us to exist. It is a place with no past or future, no beginning or end, just in a state of existence… that, only the present moment actually exists… You can read my article “A Case for God” for more information…

I think what we perceive as time is just a Grand Illusion in a way… I think we have invented a type of time, but not in the sense that there is an actual past or future… that we all just have essentially synched up our memories in a way. What makes it such a grand illusion is how logical and well it performs… based off things like the rotation of the Earth and how fast we travel around the sun… We can measure the rate of energy and the rate of decay… It is very logical to have “time”, even in a place that doesn’t actually experience what we have come to feel is time (a time that has an actual past and future… that we are constantly traveling through time or that time is traveling through us.)

We can then meet our friends at specific points in “time”… we can have schedules and all the great things that time gives us… It is essentially essential to life here in all reality… where would be without the invention of time?

I do wonder if we actually do invent real time sometimes… I think we do this when we make video games and mmorpg’s and things like that. I think that is actually more what real time is like in a way… It is something that can be continued or ended in the case of an mmorpg, or something on a predetermined line like a classic video game. That is more how I see the reality of time being though, something created… that there is no true eternal time…

That is the only place I think that time travel can exist… I think that time travel can only exist in a predetermined place where we are given an illusion of time travel… we can create a time travel video game that makes us think we are traveling through time, but we wouldn’t actually be traveling through time… we can’t time travel through an mmorpg however, although there can be predetermined elements of an mmorpg that can (Like an instance or separate predetermined game in a way)… I think an illusioned time travel can only exist on a pre-determined plane.

(Added 6/16/19: Actually you may be able to time travel on an mmorpg timeline, at least be able to travel back in time anyways and then reshape the future… Because if everyone went back to a previously saved point or something of that nature, you would then be going back in time and create a new future. I think you can only travel into a future existence in a pre-determined world though, because the future would have already had to have been created in order to travel to it… I’m sure your thoughts can run wild thinking about this stuff, even ways we could slow down or speed up our relativity and things like that on a timeline… I always envisioned that in “the zone” you could alter time, so in heaven you might have only went into “the zone” for a minute, but in “The zone”, you may have been in there for what feels like 20 years… if that makes sense. Which I think is a great feature for maintaining relationships in heaven, because if done in the right way, you can manipulate time to see a person whenever you want… That person may have went on a 100 year adventure, but you wanted to see them today, you could manipulate things to make that happen in my opinion… all sorts of interesting possibilities with “The Zone”.)

Is this making sense?

I think heaven will be somewhat similar… we will have the created and perceived time that allows us to still schedule things and meet each other at points in time, points in the present tense… but then we will have a much a better version of real time (video games and mmorpgs) where we can live out all of our fantasies and enjoy life to the fullest. (You may call it a VR or Dream World in a way… I like to call it “The Zone”)

Heaven, I believe, of course won’t be subject to many of the nightmare elements of this universe, including decay and the necessity to eat and drink to survive… But I do see this place as having elements of Heaven if you know what I mean!

Perhaps I need to name this perceived Time we have created… Or is it the real time that needs a name? I just don’t personally think we are subject to an actual past and future as many people have come to believe here, I think we are still subject to the “base state of existence”.

Would God create a person just to then send them to Hell?

Something seems innately very bad when preaching “We all get into Heaven”, “Everything is planned and predetermined”, and “Everyone is Forgiven”…. 

What’s to stop someone from thinking, I was meant to Rape this woman, it is my mission, my plan here on Earth… A person could easily validate an evil existence and even come to feel they are fulfilling a purpose in this life… May even come to see themselves as fulfilling some divine or holy purpose, completely free from guilt. 

It is a Moral paradox in a way… one not easily solved. 

We may even ask ourselves; Would God create a person just to then send them to Hell?… That too seems morally wrong. 

I personally think if someone comes to believe that and acts on it, that there is just no afterlife for them… more demon than man, perhaps even born without a Soul… Someone unfortunately meant to be evil and be discarded… Perhaps a complete product of their environment with no sense of Freedom of will. 

  • It seems morally wrong to let someone into heaven after doing that… it is also morally wrong to create a soul or person just to send them to Hell or discard them… which is why I tend to believe that those people may not actually have souls… Perhaps given a false or perceived soul meant to be overtaken by evil. 

It is Morally wrong to establish a system that would make people feel that they can get away with anything as well… certainly not in the World’s best interest. 

  • Makes a World less safe to make people feel they can get away with anything and that there isn’t such a thing as Eternal Justice. 
  • It could also cause Humans to seek our own Justice while we our down here, if God isn’t going to punish them, then surely, we must.  
  • That is not a proper way to do things… would be considered poor management by God. 

 

That is what I think about Pure evil anyways… How could they walk amongst us in heaven after that? And how could we allow for a system that would allow that to happen without proper Justice?… 

 

 

I think for lighter sentences; the punishment will fit the crime… I don’t think it all comes down to, sin and you are eliminated… Which only God in Heaven knows the exact and appropriate sentence and how to administer it. 

You live a life of stealing and avoiding work? Perhaps you will have to work the length of multiple lifetimes before you get into Heaven… maybe even have to live out a life or two where everything you have gets stolen or your loved one got killed in a robbery… 

You kill someone drunk driving… prepare to live out all of the consequences of your actions, live out the lives affected by it… 

Just drinking and driving I am sure there will be appropriate punishment, because you could have killed someone or put someone in a wheelchair for life, made someone a quadriplegic… 

You get the Jist… they will be creative and appropriate punishments in my opinion… I am sure they will go a little beyond just getting even… that your victims are +1 on the scoreboard. 

We might ask ourselves again… but why would God send us here to then punish us? Especially if our life is essentially part of some nearly predetermined plan…. Answer: Because this Universe and Life requires Justice… It requires the Fear of God… A punishment has to happen, or the system doesn’t work… If we just threatened to send criminals to jail, and never punished them or sent them to jail, imagine what would happen…. It would not be good; evil would become emboldened… A punishment is necessary…  

It is also necessary for the well-being of victims… we need to know that there is Eternal Justice to move on with our lives and be able to forgive… I have “God Gets Even” Tattooed on my leg, it was a large part of my meditation and being able to let go of the desire for Justice and Revenge… It helps a victim obtain inner peace once again… It cuts down on revenge crimes and all of that as well… 

Punishment for crimes here in the afterlife are necessary is my point… Which God sees everything, there is no getting away with nothing… Just because you didn’t get caught by the cops here, doesn’t mean you don’t still have punishment coming. 

I joke to myself that after reading this or hearing me talk about it, you have accepted the terms and agreements of life and living in this universe…  

There are Morals, there are Rules, there are Punishments… Fear of God leads to the Love of God (One of my favorite quotes and will be a blog post someday)… First, we fear and learn to follow the rules, then when following the rules becomes second nature and we are moral people, we come to feel protected by God and his promise of Heaven and an Eternal Life, we feel his Love… 

Book Club (Predictably Irrational by Dan Ariely): Chapter 4…

Thoughts in order as they appeared while reading the Chapter…

 

Market/Social Norms… very fascinating… Excellent work on breaking down the idea/viewpoint/perspective into a few pages. This Author is very good at getting his point across in the quickest way possible… It is certainly a book of just one idea after another, he doesn’t use much filler, if even at all.

I think in some households there are polite ways to ask someone if they wanted any help covering the costs for a big meal. Amongst some it could definitely be considered a nice gesture… if it is done to the side and one on one… even if turned down, some might appreciate the offer if money is somewhat tight.

  • Exceptions to the rules
  • I do see his point though, still a good example!

The gifts section made me think about birthday/Christmas and the environment. Our social norms are killing the environment quite a bit. We buy and share many gifts that often get discarded or just piled up in some closet if you know what I mean… We definitely have an over consumption problem in this country… But I can understand the social norms and why they can be viewed as important (it almost hurts just thinking of not exchanging gifts and things)…

  • It is one thing when we get stuff for kids or those in need of things… but there is a common expression in this country, what is the gift for the person who has everything? I am not even sure we have a good answer for this, but we still find gifts to give.
  • Gift cards would fall under the crossover of social/market norms… which can often be seen in a negative light… puts a number/value next to the gift
  • To me it is nice and not too bad on the environment to send someone out to dinner… or give credit to buy a book or something like that. Perhaps audible is onto something with their credit per book. Rather than giving a specific amount, it is just for whatever book. Perhaps we could adopt something like this in more places, even restaurants. Like a credit for dinner, appetizer and a drink, rather than a specific amount of money… you know what I mean! Something to think about anyways.
  • Experiences… Hard not to tie to monetary value though
  • Small Trinkets?
  • Perhaps make an arrangement to only share gifts every so many years for adults over a certain age or those not in need?
  • It is just not the same world anymore… as a nation and world we are becoming self-aware… I wish it made environmental sense to give lots of gifts. It is a great social norm in theory!
  • I could still even see it as a social norm in some form even in heaven where we have everything at our disposal, because it is such a fine gesture… One might even consider it logical to human nature.

That “scrambled sentence task” experiment was very interesting… very fascinating how and how deeply the different norms are hardwired into us, even on a subconscious level…

I keep having thoughts while reading this chapter of how family businesses can tend to bridge the gap between norms in the workplace.

  • (Note to self (possible blog post): Talk about how social norms have been creeping into the workplace, not as cold and calculating anymore… Or are they just recalculating to meet the notion that happy employees are generally more productive? A bit cynical of a perspective, probably true in some places)

I still tend to believe that social and market norms can be integrated when put in the proper context and when given the proper explanations… This stems more from a belief that we as humans are rational beings and not just programmed computers.

  • I guess that I tend to believe that cultures and people can change and that they aren’t set in stone.

Some rather large and far reaching assumptions for one simple study (Daycare Study)

Sometimes the science world can believe too much that we are all such identical computers in my own opinion… Believe too much that it is an exact science…

  • Just some terminology used gives me that feeling
  • To be fair, most scientists don’t feel themselves above their own findings and not subject to their own reasonings… To say that this doesn’t stem from a feeling of superiority, rather just being scientifically minded and curious.
  • They can take out the unique “Being Human” element… know what I mean? That we have the closest thing to freedom of will on the Planet.
  • He alters our norms as he writes and publishes this book… Contributing to the Zeitgeist.

We our evolving all of the time… our culture is constantly evolving; our personal minds are constantly evolving…

We are all unique as well in a way, where almost every individual relationship develops its own customs over time. Not every relationship is the same… we don’t apply the same norms to every relationship.

The reason I stopped taking sociology in college was that I didn’t like the idea of studying humans. I felt that it would go straight to my head, perhaps make me think I am better than or above other people… didn’t seem humanistic… I also felt it might seep into personal relationships, studying everybody and not be able to turn it off… I more wanted to experience life/people, not study it/them.

  • I think I was meant to think that at the time
  • I felt that way about 5 or 10 minutes into my first sociology class

I think companies can have it both ways… especially coming from a small town…

  • Families have rules we have to abide by as well
  • It’s all about context… also a lot about ownership and management delivering a message well…
  • Definitely truer of Mom & Pop stores
  • There is a bottom line of… we are trying to be a functioning business that is trying to stay open for a long time. But both sides agreeing to that common principle can establish a common ground more based on social norms
  • You keep taking advantage of family members and there are consequences as well.
  • Perhaps I am not describing both ways, but more of a social norm driven idea… A foundation on social norms with market norms (necessary ones) then weaved in…
  • I am not sure I understood what he meant by can’t have it both ways at first… Became clearer when I read the next section on Employer/Employees and he used the same terminology.

Thoughts on education might need their own blog post or book for that matter!

  • I personally see the value in standardized testing… keeps us more on the same page rather than everyone getting completely different educations everywhere with wide ranging curriculums and standards… Helps with admissions into college…
  • Standardized testing was/is also probably the biggest driver of research into socioeconomic differences, cultural differences, learning disabilities, etc… we are truly working towards not having any child left behind… figuring out what needs to be changed and altered to education…
  • There is a growing body of research that shows how much of an impact just being able to fire bad teachers would have on public education… It is too important to protect bad teachers the way we do. A bad teacher can impact a child years into the future if they get behind. Not everyone with a degree in teaching is cut out for it or puts forth the necessary effort, like with any career for that matter.
  • I do think we also need to instill a better respect for teachers in our society… Respect goes a long way… If a kid sees a teacher as an authority on a subject, it helps, changes their perception of the teacher and the class… Perhaps we may need to create a new title for teachers, similar to a professor at the college level, that might help. Mr. And Mrs. May not be doing it… An added level of respect, to be distinguished.
  • Make kids realize they are getting a Top Tier education. Try and instill more of a college feeling…
  • Something I like to say to kids is… you are all pretty much over the original bar of being a genius (at a young age)… what many don’t realize is that the bar gets continually raised to only keep a certain small % within it… You are genius’s getting a genius level education.
  • There are some negatives to everyone thinking they are a genius, but the positives probably outweigh the negative… and a lot of the negative can be taught out of someone… Part of being a genius is realizing that no one is right all time! for example…
  • Thinking you are average I believe helps a person learn to delegate responsibilities and trust other people. Could very much teach that to genius’s as well though, with proper lessons.
  • Perhaps we could have a graduation after middle school? Tell them how smart they actually are… try and make Junior/Senior year feel more like college in a way…
  • Just some short thoughts… would really love to dive into a think tank and get all into trade schools, etc… I have all sorts of thoughts about learning disabilities as well.

I concur it would be nice to move the bar closer to social norms on the social norm/market norm spectrum…

Some interesting thoughts and anecdotes at the end of the Chapter… Thoughts that I felt probably aren’t the conclusion of the discussion, but rather just the beginning.

Fun chapter, very thought provoking… A lot of writing and typing this week!

A Poem… “Unleash Love”

Unleash Love 

 

Love & Jealousy are forever intertwined 

To Love is to grow Jealous 

To Love deeply is to grow deeply Jealous 

America rejects Jealousy, it rejects Love 

Burned by Jealousy, Americans sought to eliminate it 

It is not something to be eliminated, but rather Tamed and Harnessed 

To understand and harness Love & Jealousy, is to let Love take over ourselves and the World 

To unleash it 

Brainstorming about cities and work/life balance… living arrangements…

This is just a brainstorm about cities, jobs, and living arrangements… Not my best stuff but will share anyways… some people may find it interesting or thought provoking… 

 

I was wondering about the potential benefits of redesigning buildings and work environments so that people could live where they work? Or perhaps at least very close… 

  • Environmentally I think it could be very good, greatly cut down on emissions getting to and from work… getting back and forth to work is probably one of, if not the most contributing factors to traffic. 
  • I personally would really like living where I work and not having to travel an hour or more in both directions every day as many people too… that just sounds awful in my opinion… seems a negative thing that greatly cuts into work/life balance. That is an insane number of hours over a working career that could be better spent with family and friends. 
  • Might make a workforce feel more like a family and community (some may not like that of course). 

Cons 

  • Could make being fired or terminated much worse of an experience. That much more emotionally invested in a company. 
  • May contribute to more heat of the moment instances/crimes… being fired and then wanting to get revenge in a multitude of ways… may even sabotage your living arrangements when you leave. 
  • With the high turnover nature of the workforce these days, may be hard to have a stable home that isn’t changing often (Moving to a new place often). 

The cons may make companies learn to treat employees much better and take more care when they do have to fire people (Be more compassionate). May actually give companies more incentive to not fire people so often and carelessly and give people more incentive and reasons to remain at their jobs and be loyal employees.  

I think under the current economy this might never work… losing your job and your home (which I think you should be given so much time to leave of course) would be too damaging. In some instances, could very well lead to homelessness or something of that nature. Put someone in a very bad position. I think in perfect capitalism and a low cost of living, the blow wouldn’t be nearly as bad though, you wouldn’t feel as though your livelihood might be over as you know it. You know what I mean… it wouldn’t have that end of the world feeling that can make people feel very desperate or angry… 

 

Maybe this could just be a potential benefit or option offered after working for a company for so long, not that you have to live there… give a little time to make sure you are the right fit before moving in as well… 

Perhaps it is a horrible idea 

I think it would be a nice option or benefit… it gives me anxiety and depression just thinking about some of these commutes people go through every day in these city areas… would feel like such a loss of life/living in my opinion… my heart goes out to you… Although some people probably don’t mind… 

You get the general idea… just some brainstorming… this could be something that very much changes the landscape of the country…