Sometimes I have to sit back and wonder what I might be getting myself into with this blog and everything…
You hear about how bad the internet can be sometimes with swatting, doxxing, threats, hacking, etc… I wonder if what I am doing would bring some of that hate my way… maybe not… I am definitely putting myself out there in a very interesting way, I wonder what angle the perceived world would accept me from?
I hate the idea of potentially damaging my family with this… that people would go after them as well…
But, at the heart of it all, I am honestly prepared to just not believe any of it… that it is all an act, a rehearsed play that I will be traversing my way through… In my opinion, that is what it all is anymore.
I have been mentally preparing myself a bit, telling myself, you can’t believe any of it, don’t engage against the negativity if it comes your way… Just ride the waves and stick to the basics…
I have played out so many scenarios in my head of potential ways this may all work out… I try to stick to the most optimistic ones but prepare mentally for the worse…
This is one of those things that I think, even while in my situation, has the potential to go viral quickly under the right circumstances, that any day I may wake up to an entirely new set of circumstances when I turn on the computer… that might not be likely, but I need to be mentally prepared in case it does.
Which, I have been getting more and more comfortable with what I am doing and managing my two different worlds… It’s easy, because it is the truth of what I think… the hard part was the idea of keeping my sanity while trying to navigate my two different worlds.
I feel I am getting closer to a good place mentally though… just over the horizon, waiting to hear back about a few things… To quote Tom Petty, “Waiting is the hardest part”, at least it feels that way at times…
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